a day off

Hard days work calls for a day off. Then your day off becomes a hard days work and you are left in a catch 22. Damn if I don't, damn if I can't get a moment of peace. But it'll soon come. Another year is close to an end for me and a day of celebration will commence (this time its more of a weekend). How I should celebrate is the main question? I might be getting too old to go all out drunk at the club, plus there is no definite way home. I have a good idea of what I will be doing and I'm sure the planned activities will be fun but I can't wait to experience the unplanned events.

Speaking of plans. Is it bad to plan ahead? To me if I don't plan then comes bad last minute decisions that lead to regret. Its especially worst with money. But then they say don't count your chickens before they crap on your car (or something like that).

relax yourself

These guys were and are the smoothest sound in hip hop. But they sound like early outkast. I think that's one of the reasons maybe they didn't make it. People always say you biting someone's style but that's pretty much always the case. Its just how much can you hide the fact. Either way, I love these dudes.

old man in the river

Every time I see my parents I think, "Damn I look just like pops." Its true. Day by day I grow into the man that I learned to respect but never liked. The man was hard on us but I've come to find out that he made a lot of important decisions for us, so much respect. But now I'm at an age where I gotta make decisions. I wonder if its going to be the same decisions he had to make and what I should be learning from him. I know now that he doesn't have all the answers. I gotta outsource for the proper knowledge.

If growing up was hard, being grown is even harder.

family sitcoms step your game up

I've figured out how to do a funny family sitcom. You either need a funny stand up comedian who can do more jokes than just about how funny their child was or you need a family in a funny situation. Everybody Loves Raymond is good cuz the parents are crazy and they live next door, Weeds is funny because the mother sells weed to get by in the surburbs, Married W/ Children: c'mon Al was a women's shoe salesman.

I'm speaking of this because House of Payne and The Bill Engvall Show (sp) are not funny. They lack the aforementioned techinques. House of Payne sucks because having your mom being a crackhead and you have to live with your grandparents isn't funny. Its sad and we all hope we never have to face that in life. None of those kids (if they were real kids) will look back in there lives when they grow old and think that was funny how mom was on crack. The Bill Engvall Show is just a normal family doing quorky things. Bill is not a real comedian, just a good story teller. The stories are funny on stand up sure but not in a sitcom.

Basically I'm tired of trying to give these shows a chance and just hope people can be more creative when thinking of a new family sitcom. I mean in real funny family sitcoms you can always go back to the foundation of the show and laugh. Every episode something funny would be happening on top of something already funny. Look at King of Queens: They are a couple living with a crazy father in the basement and Doug is a true comedian in his stand up. So anything that happens can always fall back on the interaction of the crazy Arthur and the Heffernans.

I love great comedy and I should not be denied.

all is forgiven

the pill

They don't sing lullabies about nights like this
The tunes play over and over in your head
As lights blind your direction to clarity
Moments pass as if your sleep is stealing your life
Regrets, afterthoughts, corrections will follow you in your shadow
And as the night draws near to an end
You appreciate those at your side
I hope they understand
I made a mistake.

late night binge

i noticed that late at night when people want to eat all kinds of foods, they look at me with such disdain because I don't want to eat. Sure I'll take a couple of bites of this or that but dive into a full meal, nope not for me. Then comes the question, well are you on a diet? No. I just don't eat late at night. I never have.

Growing up I ate at lunch and at dinner time. Sometimes I might eat at breakfast but not always. If I got hungry late at night, I'll have some tea to warm my stomach and go to bed. The truth is we never had late night snacks. Well maybe crackers or something but thats about it.

The real reason though of why I don't eat at night is because a lesson learned freshman year of college (I think that's when I learned all my lessons).

The Late Night Cafeteria.
It sounded good, especially since I got in late after work and I wasn't physically paying with money because it was on a card that was given to me. I could get chicken wings, fries, pizzas, ice cream, and my favorite: smoothies. It was also a social gathering: you could study with friends, joke around, and meet new people.

But something strange would happen over night. While I slept, the evil of greasy foods would turn in my tummy. There was a war going on and it left me defeated every morning. Because every morning after a late night binge was a trip to the stalls for an explosion of gases and particles that I didn't know came out that end of my anatomy. So I learned quickly, you don't put greasy, delicious foods in your tummy before you go to bed.

Now when I'm out and I see everybody stuffing there face with everything they ordered, I thank God that I won't have to be in their home while the eruption of internal gases leaks under the crevices of the bathroom door. Its just another lesson learned when you're cooking with grease. (may the irony consume you all)

mind sex - Dead Prez

nuff said.

thinking 4000 words a minute

I can't tell you what I'm thinking right now cause right now its all relative. Decisions, decisions, decisions, that's the rest of my life. Full of decisions. What next, what now, who, what so um, I think I should, maybe if I duh, I like pig feet. Next up, time to go to work. Oh work?! Fourteen in the hole last night. "No one is to leave the bank until I get there." Interesting to see where things go from now and they won't even take me anywhere else. I guess I gotta go for the gusto. Hey Gus, my final thought of the day is kill yourself. That's a crazy mess. The future is in your hand and I got the machete, your vote doesn't count. We're all savages, you didn't know that? We just choose to live in a safer environment. The beautiful design/experiment/accident/confused state of mind. Give me money and it'll all be easier. What's up with product placement. You got a 1:30 min video and spend 5 secs on a camera. I know how to take a picture. A waste of my time. Maybe this blog, maybe my words, maybe television, maybe talking to you. Who knows. Time is like that. A beeatch!

i'm too old for this

The older you get is it harder to make friends for as a male?

I know I'm not that old yet but still can't see myself making a lot more male friends. If I'm looking to make a new friend it is usually gonna be a female and for different reasons than making a male friend. I just can't see myself approaching another dude like hey man lets go grab a beer.

AsayWhatMan?! I'd get knocked out.

I think one of the reasons is that men just don't talk that much. I mean like regular talk, past the how's the weather but not as far as how are you feeling. I guess I'm just not in the right places to make a new male friend. If I had to do a job or something with a dude I could see us chillin afterwards or something but other than that, I'm not going out to meet new males. And in Atlanta that's very dangerous. I might end up as some guys play toy.

Poems by G

Yeh, so, I think I'm a poet. I'm rummaging through my old things on a lazy Sunday and I realize I wrote a lot of poems and rhymes between high school to sophomore year in college. So I share some with you.

I remember why I first started to write poetry, to get girls of course! It's how I got my first 3 girlfriends I believe. It wasn't my first poem though. The first one I ever wrote was in 3rd grade. It was an assignment. I wrote about batman. It was good but I can't remember it. It had to do with the man of the night.

I wrote a lot poems about love, fantasies, girls I was mad at because they didn't show me no love then post it online for everybody to see and then get calls from people like how could you do this. Whoa, flashback.

Poems are still a good creative release. Enjoy, snap your fingers, and drink some coffee.

Tainted

Brown eyes flooded with the blood of despair
Can not recognize the color of her heart
When tears fall they stain the glass mirrors
And burn holes through the sheets that hide her from the world
As she sleeps, songs of the sea calms her soul
Until she realizes she's alone and violent rage drowns her emotions
External bliss as she smiles, only for a moment
Melts the thin ice surrounding her heart
Forging crystal figurines through fire
Locked in titanium steel vaults with no lock and key
Growing by the day but still a girl inside cries
While it lies on broken glass, one inch from its death
Wearing a crown of hope for the prince to arrive
But the dragon is her protection
As she speaks, her eyes scream for help
Her touch grabs my soul and demands me never to let go
She disappears as darkness comes upon my eyes
The only thing left is the cold mist from her breath
Shaping into her first facial expression of when I said,
I love you

Please Post A Reply

Can I get some replies
Oh why oh why must a poem die
When not recognized
By wise guys with time
To develop their inner mind
By reading these lines
With one breath that can define
The great track of time
Revealed to the blind
Beloved by few that can claim as mine
Become a legend when betrayed through written crime
Oh why, oh why
Must my poem die
You speak a word of truth or please me with lies
Read words critically and try to criticize
So I can live my ways free and circumcised
Reword the words I say so I to realize
What emotions inside are truly my demise
I shall close my eyes
And when I open up wide
I want to see cries of "whoa" and "that's tight"
Oh try, oh try
Don't let this poem die
You've been given a piece of me you must water with your replies
Listen to my demand as I sigh
From uppin my own poem from the bottom of the pile

Broadcast

Listening to the jams on the radio
Head gassed, holla shorty and all I get is hell no
Seems like every story they sing isn't my reality
Are you feeling me
Or is your head still bouncing to the beat
They say I'll be your everything
But you say I'm just a friend
If I could turn back the hands of time you would be mine again
I can't feel on your booty-yes its-licious
But that baby mama drama got you acting malicious
After saying your name you want me to pay your bills
Misunderstanding songs of Lauryn Hill
Can you be my down ass bitch
Say I'm not offensive till you defending from me putting you down ass bitch
I wanna take a long walk
But end up finger fucking in the park
Cuz its the only time we think no ones watching in the dark
I got bruises from being down on my knees
Its not from begging please
Its because I saw them hotel fees
Just freeze, if you need the ice
The heat will never come on if you looking nice
Won't you be my girlfriend
So I can write another song because you're gone
Then so long, get your bags and get the hell on
It's over now, yet I still scream for peaches and cream
Too many years of broadcasting fantasies
Has turned my reality into a Hip hop melody
The perfect girl is not in Destiny's world
And success is not a 2 million dollar chain with a alligator vest
I must contest the way this game is being played
Making a ripple in the lake bu trying to make a wave

wheat thins help you stay regular

it's important. But its also important to change things up a little. Take a risk, do the unsafe thing. Fear is just an emotion. You know those days when you choose to be unhappy, when you don't feel like talking to nobody? Fear is the same thing. You can choose not to be afraid of what will happen next.

I remember I had a fear of heights and spiders when I was young (I still kinda do). But I got over it. You know how? I got on the tallest balance beam at the park and jumped off. I stared down a spider and killed it with a shoe. Simple as that. You gotta take over your fears. A lot has to do with God as well. People always talk about they trust in God but ask them to take a risk in their life and they won't. They'll say its stupid, unsafe, and God wouldn't approve. But God was there with every other mistake you made what makes you think that when you make a conscious decision He won't continue to be there?

Don't be scared.

water, water, everywhere

glistening, sparkling, trembling, purifying
while the world breathes in the fumes of savagery and chaos
the liquids seep there way into the crevices of inner thought
relaxation takes upon us only for the blinking moment of peace
but tranquility lies in the pastures beyond our gardens
the dew drips down tall blades of flourish
reaching to heavens before the trampling steps of mankind war upon each other
a cool sense of freedom is all that we hope for
as our lips chap to the regrets of pursuit for unconditional love
its life is made to resurrect the death of millions of lost souls
water is for the movement of people.

===========================

So I started drinking water now. A real penny saver. I figure since moms got the beaties I should watch my sugar and salt intake. It only makes sense. She got to drink water only now. Think about after almost 50 years of drinking juice, coffee, soda, sweet gold she's forced to drink water. That's gotta be hard to get used to. So I practice now. We got to learn people or we fall into the same trap as before.

Hopefully I'll lose some weight and then I'll start exercising again. I know what you are thinking, I should do the workout thing right now. I've tried, but what's the point if I'm eating Hardees hamburgers every week (them things are the devil, oh so good). So this time around I'm trying to learn how to eat. No its not a diet, it's a cut back. Cut back on juice, sugar, bread, beer, eating till I'm full. I think I grew the size of my stomach during the discovery of 3.99/lb chinese buffet (if Hardees is the devil, Chinese buffet is his demon son, crab ragoons are so good). I also gotta cut back on eating out and start cooking again. Chef Ya boyz-a-G is back in the kitchen feeling like G. Garvin himself ( I can't wait till I get my own pepper mill). I'm not too bad. I made some pasta with cheese and grilled chicken tenders that was so good, I almost kicked myself. Ladies watch out, I'm becoming the perfect husband (but you still need to know how to cook yourself).

Oh you know what I'm feeling, Kanye West's Can't Tell Me Nothing


Wait till I get my money right. Then you can't tell me nothing. That's how I feel right now. I just got quicken and I'm budgeting, planning, analyzing all of my finances. Oh I ain't rich yet but wait till I get my money right.

keep it moving

In life you'll come to a stand still. Bump it, a stand off. Its just you and your arch nemesis staring at each other with equal ammunition and skill. Who will win? Well you must win because its your life. This is just not a bump in the road or fork in the path. This is the decision to continue on the path. There is always the option of stopping and smelling the roses but what if there is some African wild flower that eats you whole? Do you really want to stop at all?

You have to face your opponent with full force. Keep him from seeing what your move is going to be. Sure he knows exactly who you are. This is what makes him different from every other obstacle you've faced. He knows your favorite weapon, how you like to shoot it, and how fast you can use it. What you gotta do is hit him with something he'll never expect. Take out the bazooka on his ass. Boom! Destroy everything: the path, the enemy, even a piece of yourself. When the ashes fall and the smoke lifts, look at the new ground in front of you and create your new road.

me without you

I think of you only to pass the time spent away from you
I wait for you while the phone never rings
I answer to your voice but only my spirit speaks to your emotions
Its what I do to live day to day without your breath dancing down my chest

in a perfect world

what would we do with a perfect world
no violence, no hatred, no competition
no classes, no racism, no religious warfare

I believe we would miss out on a lot. There might be no love, no desire, no motivation. Face all the things wrong in the world is a necessary evil for all the things right. If we didn't fight for what we love than would we love anything. Think about it. When was the last time you had some food that you been dying for all day and when you get to someone else wanted a piece? You would damn near kill that person for trying to touch it. All the bad things in the world are done for love. Sometimes its too much love so it leads to senseless violence. Like if you love yourself too much you can go crazy if something bad happens. So nowadays when a see some crazy fool shooting up people for apparently no reason, I know its just for something he loved too much. Its just a part of life. No surprise. No wondering if one day we won't see it again. Its just life. It comes and it goes. Live it to the fullest.

Liquor and Me

Liquor is me, liquor I be
Fun with liquor, I love liquor and me